Sideshow & Syrana

(The Doctor has prescribed a dosage of Capwn, so we’re fillin’ the ‘script today.)

Finally.

Syrana changed her password… tryin’ to block my midnight runs.  I’ve been fienin’ for a fix somethin’ awful.  She’s not as easy to distract as Mary.  I mean check this out… those cats are my heroes.  And their sweet DK Puppykiller?

Epic.

Although, it takes two of them to play one toon.  I do it all myself.  Because I’m awesome.

*tail flicks about, stops to scratch behind his ear*

You know, Syrana’s Google Reader is filled with a gazillion blogs… blahblahblah.  Mine has only 4 in it.

That’s right.

4.

One for each paw of power.  I’ve got those WoW playin’ kitties in there fo’ sho’.  Then I have that little ballsy Gnomer.  He looks mighty tasty, what can I say?  I also gotta get my fix of WTFspaghetti.  Although, I’m thinkin’… WTFchickenliversandgravy.

Mmm nom noms.

*licks chops, eyes glaze over for a moment*

I might have to start that… especially if Syrana keeps shooin’ me away from her computer.

And last, there’s Jong.  He’s funny as hell and pwns everyone left and right.  Too bad he’s not going to write anymore.  I totally woulda asked him to 2′s with me.  We woulda tore it up.

Speaking of which….

*ears flatten back*

My toon is gone.  GONE! Syrana claims she has no idea what happened.  I think she was just jealous.  I mean, some forum troll the other day said something about how her gear looked like the corn in his poop.  I guess it’s a pretty big insult that her gear looks… undigested? whole?

She refuses to have my druid restored.  So, I have to reroll.

It’s alright, it won’t take me long… with a flurry of teeth and claws I’ll be back on top.  And just in time for badge changes, too! Get ready so I can Conquest yer face!

*licks fervently at his paw*

You know, this dumb cat calendar that Syrana has said something about cats groom themselves an average of 5 hours a day.

5 hours!

A day!

That’s insane.  There’s no way I do that.  That would totally cut into my WoW time…

*lounges on chair*

So, where should I reroll?

So this morning, my “masters,” Syrana and Sideshow, disturbed my lovely nap so they could crowd in front of the computer.

Syrana kept babbling about tickets all week long.  That warlock is so crazy, she was mumbling about tickets, costumes, and murlocs in her sleep last night.  I couldn’t even stay in the bedroom, so I went and pwnd some noobs for a few hours.

But this morning…. I paid closer attention to what they were doing.  I stealthed into the room and watched them with idle curiosity.

Syrana saw me after a few minutes, so I pretended to wash my face.  She started talking about “BlizzCon,” panels, costumes, and other unimportant things.

My ears perked up when at 11:59am CST Sideshow said he was in the queue.

Syrana got all in a tizzy asking about numbers and sqwakin’ on twitsomethingorother.

I hopped up onto her lap and saw all this was about WoW.

That’s my game!  Seriously, she needs to let me play more.

I hadn’t cared much last week when they were talking about going to California and booked their hotel and flight.  But now, now I know what they are up to.

Here, I was looking forward to a whole weekend of uninterrupted pwnage and ganking dbags… but now…

I dashed downstairs and tested the luggage.  I could easily fit in there.  And costume? *smirk* The warlock collects pets, so hello! Capwn would be the ideal companion to complete the getup, amirite?

I headed back upstairs, got distracted by some string, then went in by Sideshow.  Syrana was on her way out the door and looked worried.

Bastards! Sideshow hit 1000 in the queue when the tickets sold out.

They shoulda let me handle it, I woulda pwnd that queue for all 3 of us.

Well, Syrana started babbling about trying for contests and the 30th.  I guess more tickets will be available then.  You know, for a warlock, she can be pretty optimistic.

*Jumps in Sideshow’s computer chair, looking around*

Good, it’s nice and quiet in here.

*Flicks tail, lazily washing at whiskers*

I don’t get a lot of time to play, since those two noobs are always at their computers.  And weekends? Forget it! The only time I can safely log on is in the middle of the night.  Bella is supposed to be my look out, but she fails at it.  Freckles can be counted on sometimes.

Oh man, I get him in so much trouble… jumping on the counter… I just tell him there’s some food and up he goes! Lawl.

Wait, what was tha-

…

Loud truck went by, I had to hide… er, um, investigate.

Anywho, I wanted to share some druid love.  Cuz, these two, they play lame-o broken classes that no one likes.  Little do they know, I haz an uber druid.

And I rawk the PvP.

And I’m no carebear either.  I rolled on a PvP server cuz I’m hardcore like that.  I’m finally breakin’ out into the contested zones and it’s been a blast pwn’in’ noobs everywhere I go.

Like the other night, I was doing some quests and I could just smell noobcake near me.  I shifted into me form and stealthed up to them.

Bam! Ganked the beotch.

He’s all crying and begging.  I was like “Wut up? U got Capwn’d lol”

*scratches behind ear*

I’m pretty good at pwn’in’ IRL too.  Check this shizz out:

Too bad I can’t earn honor points off that big ol’ cat.  He’s like, what, 4 levels higher and 6 pounds heavier than me?  He’s fine if he’s pwn’in’ me, but once I take Tonz of Fun down, he’s all QQing to Syrana and Sideshow.

Baby.

He doesn’t play too much since he likes to sleep.  I can’t blame him, but I get my best sleep when Syrana and Sideshow are at work.  When Freckles does play, I make him be my meatshield.  I mean, just look at him.  He has tank written all over him, amirite?

*Leaps out of chair and dashes under the bed.  A few minutes go by before he slinks back to the computer*

I heard something again.

*Looks at computer screen*

Aww dammit! Some dbag ganked me while I was AFK.  WTF?! So uncool.

*Licks his paw and rubs behind his ear, then licks at his back a couple times*

Looks like I’m going to be putting these quests on hold while I camp this jerk.

And no, I can’t tell you noobs what my toons name is or which server.  You’d be jealous of my pure awesomeness.

*Looks at the window, noticing the sun starting to rise*

Crap, looks like I better go nap on the couch.  But one thing is certain, if I don’t get me some Fancy Feast this week, I’m deleting Syrana’s toons.

After I take her gold.

Hmm, I should make Sideshow a chick.  That’d be funny.